Intro

Tag: status update

Someone almost raped my friend – so she did this, which prevented it.

Sofie Hagen

Multi-award-winning stand-up comedian, but my uncle wants to know when I'm going to lose some weight. A lot of guys have told me that they'd LOVE to be my boyfriend, if they weren't already married. I once joined a beginner's dance class but didn't realise till it was too late that it was a beginner's dance class for already-professional dancers who were only beginners in that particular dance and we were standing very tight and it was the worst hour of my life. I once made out with the lead actor of 'The Bridge' (first two seasons).

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things I’ve talked about

beauty blog body image boyfriend comedian comedians comedienne comedy dating datingadvice deborah frances white facebook fat feminism funny girlfriend greys anatomy intercourse jessamyn stanley killers london love nomakeupselfie normal nudity onenightstand personal pickup podcast psychology rape selfies serialkillers sex sexual assault single standup status update yoga

My Instagram

Jodie (@jodiemitchetc) and I have some great news. We are bringing @secretdinosaurcult to Manchester for their podcast festival. Ticket link is in the bio of @secretdinosaurcult 🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕 On Monday (24th) we are in LONDON at the @phoenixartsclub and ticket link is ON OUR WEBSITE. 🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕🦖🦕 #SecretDinosaurCult

Fourth day sick in bed. I don’t have a voice. This is bullshit.

I wanted to document the face of someone who has watched Frasier all day. #HappyFat

TOMORROW. The man behind the phrase ‘are you taking a photo of me again’, @watsoncomedian and I are doing a SHOW at @2northdown tomorrow at 8.15pm. It’s part ‘doing jokes’ and part SECRET PROJECT. Come and hang out with us. 🦔 Tickets on my website or on @2northdown ‘s website.

Oh, I forgot to tell you. 1) I’m in love with these dungarees and the colour yellow right now. 2) on Tuesday I’m doing a show at @2northdown with @watsoncomedian - it’s part new stand-up material and part SECRET NEW PROJECT. 🎩 Tickets through my website.

Tiny child me. Same hairdo. Same face. Same taste in jewellery. Same taste in music. Same sense of humour. Same taste in boys (whoever sits next to me in class). #NeverChange

I’m decluttering at the moment (‘Ah, what a lovely productive way of fleeing thinking about your actual problems’ - my therapist) and I’ve thrown out/donated so much stuff, been to Ikea, built furniture for six hours, taken deep breaths of dust and in the middle of it all, I received a parcel full of Danish stuff from @scandikitchen and I’m so happy. Right, enough with the Instagramming, on to figuring out how the fuck to sort my earrings and also VACUUMING and SORTING BOOKS BY TOPIC (fat / social politics / @watsoncomedian books / self help / books I’ve been given and probably should read which I will one day when the internet ends)

When you eat so many pizzas, they put your face on the pizza box.

Oh, look how hot we are. I am so excited. Going back to London today to do the @secretdinosaurcult with @jodiemitchetc at the @phoenixartsclub 🦖🦕 It’ll be our first London recording (Cult Meeting) and it’s SELLING OUT. 🦕🦖 There are still tickets left through my website - link in bio! See you tonight.

I am still hungover from that one night in Edinburgh where I got so drunk I forgot I was wearing glasses.

Something exciting is happening. A brand new show about dinosaurs, daddy issues and other fun stuff. Come to the first show in London on Tuesday at the Phoenix Artist Club and hang out with @jodiemitchetc and me! 🦖 Tickets on sofiehagen.com and secretdinosaurcult.com 🦕

Okay, LISTEN! This odd fetishization of ‘hygge’ has to stop. I have seen countless of £20-30 books written by non-Danes about ‘hygge’, I have seen £30 CANDLES called HYGGE, £80 blankets for ‘hygge’ and STOOOOP. If ‘hygge’ is ANYTHING, it’s free. Brits, you already hygge a lot. Hygge is drinking tea, chilling with friends, hanging out, going to the pub, being warm when it’s cold, looking at the lights on Oxford Street, drinking coffee. It’s just relaxing, feeling good. There. I just saved you a shit-ton of money. One of these books said ‘hygge will set you free’ and BITCH, WHAT? Calm yourself now. HYGGE WILL NOT FILL THE VOID THAT MAKES YOU FEEL SAD. Hygge is £0. Also will non-Danes stop telling me how to pronounce a Danish word? Thanks. . . Also I’m doing a show in Copenhagen tonight. Tickets are on my website. It will be hyggeligt.

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